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xkcd bot@lemmy.worldB to xkcd@lemmy.worldEnglish · 4 days ago

xkcd #3257: Beam Pipe

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xkcd #3257: Beam Pipe

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xkcd bot@lemmy.worldB to xkcd@lemmy.worldEnglish · 4 days ago
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xkcd #3257: Beam Pipe

Title text:

‘If you keep trying to spray your collaborators with the beam when they’re not looking, I’m turning off the ion source and NO one will get to play with the beam!’ --Physics’s mom

Transcript:

Transcript will show once it’s been added to explainxkcd.com

Source: https://xkcd.com/3257/

explainxkcd for #3257

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  • renegadespork@lemmy.jelliefrontier.net
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    4 days ago

    Never mind that their thumb is now an anti-thumb.

    • wieson@feddit.org
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      4 days ago

      The only person that can count to -1

    • Zorque@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      One two three four, would you like to play thumbonuclear war?

    • Ulvain@sh.itjust.works
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      4 days ago

      You have to be careful with that logic, or born again right wing christian groups will go nuts. Lemme explain.

      If

      Christ is everywhere

      Then

      Christ is in the large Hadron collider.

      And if

      [stuff] inside the collider becomes anti-[stuff]

      Then:

      –> The LHC creates the Antichrist.

      !!

      • BananaOnionJuice@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        4 days ago

        Then The Antichrist and Christ touches and is turned into energy, and levels half of Switzerland.

        • SanguinePar@lemmy.world
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          4 days ago

          And think what that would do to the snow sports industry.

        • cockmushroom@reddthat.com
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          3 days ago

          Oh no, they’d have to move the wef to monaco

      • finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        God, it would be funny to see people protesting based on this.

      • renegadespork@lemmy.jelliefrontier.net
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        3 days ago

        Today’s satire is tomorrow’s debate topic.

        • Ulvain@sh.itjust.works
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          2 days ago

          I wish i could push back on that by saying no one would be dumb enough to make that argument non satirically, but…

    • anar@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      3 days ago

      Never shall they twiddle

  • bright@piefed.social
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    4 days ago

    This kills the thumb

    • cockmushroom@reddthat.com
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      3 days ago

      The mind is willing, but the flesh is bruised

    • Eheran@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      Would it actually?

      • Hacksaw@lemmy.ca
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        3 days ago

        I mean… Yes? https://www.askamathematician.com/2011/06/q-if-you-stood-in-the-beam-of-the-lhc-what-would-happen/

        • Eheran@lemmy.world
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          2 days ago

          Reads more like a clear no? Even with an actual person who experienced it?

    • Tja@programming.dev
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      4 days ago

      But is powerful as hell for that brief moment!

  • 1995ToyotaCorolla@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    I use a sprayer (pictured) to water my tomatoes. Maybe the scientists could adapt something like that for their collider? BTW what happens when you put the collider on the “mist” setting?

  • SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world
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    4 days ago

    Imagine backing up and shoving that in your butt.

    • neukenindekeuken@sh.itjust.works
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      4 days ago

      It would literally give you ass cancer.

      • JayDee@lemmy.sdf.org
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        3 days ago

        Oh no, you wouldn’t even have time to get cancer. That shit’ll just straight up kill your cells then and there.

    • topherclay@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      The hose scientists are like “hmm the particles stopped flowing, there must be a kink.”

    • Telemachus93@slrpnk.net
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      4 days ago

      Let’s make anti-shit!

  • FiniteBanjo@feddit.online
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    4 days ago

    Oh, like covering the end of the hose, lol

    I could be wrong but I don’t think those particles are largely effected by that type of pressure.

  • nexguy@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    I loved drinking from the beam pipe as a kid

  • uhmbah@lemmy.ca
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    2 days ago

    Oh man, LMAO

    Best post and thread I’ve seen in a long time!

    And just when I needed it.

  • Gork@sopuli.xyz
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    4 days ago

    Behold… The Extra-Large Hadron Collider!

    • zwerg@feddit.org
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      4 days ago

      Hell, let’s go American sizes… XXXL Hadron Collider!

  • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    Is that like the water jet from the swimming pool? Can I masturbate with it, too, or will it melt my nads into a gooey paste? I’m gunna try either way, I just wanna know what to expect.

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