• bizarroland@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    I will warn you to never try spam macaroni and cheese.

    It tasted okay.

    But at 3 o’clock in the morning, I awoke.

    I awoke to feel my butt hole opening up to let out the longest continuous silent fart I have ever experienced in my entire life.

    It was a long, slow, unbroken woosh, like my butt had been waiting to exhale my entire life up until that moment, and it had to wake me up to announce that.

    I honestly wish I had just shit the bed. That would have been far less traumatizing.