This was great. For an encore, can you write an eloquent defense of American milk chocolate. American Cheese is to the grilled cheese sandwich, as Milk chocolate is to s’mores.

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It angers old people because of the poor grammar and bad maths habits, not because children are implying they’re old.

The 1900s would still only be like 1909 at the latest. You’ve got too much precision and called out the wrong decade. This floppy form factor was invented in 1981, peaked in popularity and was replaced by CDs by 2000. Spanning 2 decades in the late twentieth (20th) century, not the late 1900s. See the difference in the number of digits? That difference in the number of stated digits is significant.

“If this coffee is the most dark and bitter part of my day, I’ll consider myself lucky.”

It was happening long before TMNT. Transformers, He-man, Teddy Ruxbin, Gummie Bears, She-ra, Care Bears, etc. I’m no expert on which was the first, but I’m sure that the kids that watched it would be too old to really get into TMNT once that IP hit the market. TMNT wasn’t even really inspired by toys, the comic was first, they just heavy exploited the toy market later. Shows like Care Bears and transformers were created specifically to sell toys as opposed to designing toys to sell a show.