Not sure how to continue.
If the only consequences of cheating is your emotions and the damages comes from your reaction (don’t necessarily mean violent, I mean like breaking up) then the act itself might not be the bad thing but the way you react.
Life is too short to deny ourself relationships that bring us joy, and how cruel is to expect that from anyone, especially not those whom we love.
You associate the meal to her, if she does something without you, it inherently changes the meal. and now you dont like the new meal.
I associate the meal to the relationship. you get your meals, and her having a snack somewhere else will in no way change the meals that you get with her. And being upset about it is like complaining that your meal in a restaurant is bad because other people also ordered the same.
But meal wise, she did not serve you anything wrong. all that she did is that she served another meal to someone else. You got your meal, exactly as you want to.
Otherwise is like me going to a restaurant and complain that despite my food being excellent, I was upset that the waiter had the audacity to serve someone else the same meal. It was meant only for me, because I am special, and only I get that meal.
A vegetarian would be very mad about being told a lie that the meal they were being served is vegetarian if it actually contained meat, and rightfully so imo.
That would be more like you are vegan and your partner had a steak yesterday by herself without you. IF you expect her to be vegan you might be upset, but she did not force you to eat anything.
It just seems like setting up a rule “You must remain chaste without me” is inherently irrational. and “Only I am the one you are allowed to receive romancing and intimate affection from” is not a good long term plan, given that all relationships (and people) change a grow with time.
i went into details on other aspects of monogamy I find internally unethical. Maybe cheating is bad, but at best it’s a victimless crime, as bad a cheating on a diet. rather than it being published with social isolation.
life it too short to set up relationships based on the denial of feeling for others.
just saying, that if they need to lie to fulfill their needs, then there isn’t a relationship to begin with.
genocide shouldn’t be political, the same way murder isn’t political
this post is antisemantic
you gave me two memes. so more than a fair share. in fact it’s such a good value that I’m the one who stole from you
You can’t steal what I rightfully stole!! https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/e96fd0f8-1c32-43f5-bb3c-077b7bba7db3.jpeg
fool, you failed at stealing, by turning it into a trade
irl?
did a mod walk to your house and hand you ban papers?
I mentioned somewhere here that I consider putting such expectations on someone unethical. If my partner has an affair they would tell me and I would be happy for her or neutral, but if they were hiding it, and lying then there was no really a relationship to begin with, just a lie that should end sooner than later.
And in another thread, I said that the social punishment for people who cheat is too severe, often being social isolation. For an infraction I would personally consider as bad as cheating on a diet. For something that causes no harm to anyone.
Social punishment for cheating, is often social isolation. I don’t think a minor victimless infraction warrant said punishment.
And the fact that there’s another person who has the right to consent on your own body sounds very iffy.
Also, we treat “monogamy” as a natural thing. it isn’t. if it was, there would be no divorces, breakups, or affairs.
Also the state and religions push monogamy as the upmost important relationship in someone’s life, rather than community, which atomises people and destroys communities with the modern invention of “nuclear family”. where evey need is comodified rather than being provided by a community.
yhea, it doesn’t exist, what are snowflakes gonna do, dm me pictures of their’s to prove me wrong? they would if it was real
me: I think slavery is bad because it unfairly controls other people
You: you are the unethical one. trying to control what other people do with lives
not a serious answer, doesn’t warrant a serious response.
instead of pointing why my grievances with monogamy are wrong, (mentioned repeatedly in many of the threads that spawn here), you just made up a bs reason why any moral standards is unethical.
English is in part ancient Celtic, but ask any English speaker and they’ll tell you they don’t speak Celtic.
therefore English doesn’t have Celtic influences…
yhea, that is why cheating and breakups are so rare in monogamous relationships.
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